Friday Five

I am just in a mood. I’ve been in this mood for a day or two. I’m feeling all snarky and mean. The boy is sick and his molars are coming in…so he’s cranky and refusing to nap…to which my response is “Oh. But you *will* nap.” Apparently, babies feel pretty comfortable ignoring imperative directives though, so we may be at a stand-off there. He’s currently throwing things out of his crib to see if I will come pick them up for the forth time. I’ve decided to ignore the behavior and see what happens if I don’t respond. In the meantime, I’m going to go start a flamewar somewhere so I can be vicious to stupid people.

1. You have just won a million dollars: Who do you call first?

My tax attorney.

2. What is the first thing you buy for yourself?

Land. Lots and lots of land. Probably initially buy land for turnover, roll it a few times, then hopefully have a stake large enough to pay for the land I want to keep.

3. What is the first thing you buy for someone else?

Toys, books and clothes for the boy and the man. Airplane tickets for my parents to come visit and a hotel room and rental car…because I’m not an idiot.

4. Do you give any away? If yes, to whom?

Local food banks, local battered women’s shelter, local efforts for the homeless.

5. Do you invest any? If so, how?

Absolutely. Gold. Blue chip, high-yield dividend stocks, currency hedge funds.

The sad thing about this FF is that a million dollars isn’t what it used to be. Taxes on winnings are 50%…so that really only leaves you with 500K. And while 500K isn’t chump change…it sure won’t buy a whole lot anymore. For instance, the odds of being able to buy a working farm, equipment, stock and seeds for the first year with 500K is miniscule. Heck, a good tractor is more than 100k. Farms of more than 20 acres are about 700k if they’ve got a house and water on the land.

Sigh. I’m never going to be able to go live in the country again. Plus, all the areas in Texas which used to be amazing farm land are now subdivisions. It’s sad.

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