The Evil…The horror….the horror……

DisneyWorld. There. I’ve said it. I try not to curse in public, but sometimes, one just has to do so. DisneyWorld. Could there be anything more evil that doesn’t include sharks with lasers on their heads? Hmmm?

I was thinking that maybe I could talk Man into a vacation this year, as we haven’t taken one since before Boy was born…and I thought to myself; “Self, you know what Boy would love? Disney!”, and I responded to myself “Self…have you lost your feeble little mind?”. Sure signs that something is terribly amiss when I talk to…and answer…myself.

I mean, I can get over the prices…although, how do people with multiple kids afford that insanity? I can get over the brightly colored revisionism. It might take Prince Valium, but I’m pretty sure I could get over the concept of every single ride and attraction emptying into a store which will lead to meltdowns after every thing we do.

But when almost everything is described as “bustling”; I know this to be marketing shorthand for “mob scene which will involve hundreds of sticky children, annoyed parents and idiots in costumes”…to borrow a phrase from Sir Winston Churchill; Up with this, I will not put.

Well, ok…I’ll have to put up with it at least once, but I think it may wait until next year. I’m not sure he’s big enough to ride some of the things I know he’d really like to see like the Space exhibits at Epcot. Must measure Boy.

For those of you whom have braved the perils of Mount Happy Mouse Ears, how old were your kids? If you had it to do over again, what age would you think was the perfect age? How many days did you stay? (I was originally thinking 6 nights, 7 days…but Man thinks it’s quite possible I would go insane if we were at Disney for that long. Well…more insane.) Did you stay at a resort on property, or somewhere in Kissimmee? Any other tips, advice, stories, warnings you’d like to share?

Comments are disabled for this post