I do this all the time. I look at some impossible home project, and suddenly in my mind, I’m Bob the Freaking Builder. I am apparently quite insane.

None of the walls are straight. Not one. There is not a single 45 degree angle in that entire room. The potty is crooked enough that I can’t even fathom how to work around it. I’ve already cut my tiles from 12×12 to 6×6, and that’s still not small enough I don’t think, to work around the weird damn angles.

Plus I have to take a sharp right out of the room where the potty is, to the room where the vanities and sinks and tub and shower are…and I have no idea how I’m gonna make that work.

And…to top it all off…none of the tiles are actually 12×12. They’re like 11 3/8 and 11.5, and 11.75….but none of them are the same damn size, making it almost impossible to get cuts where the tiles are the same size.

On the plus side, at least I’m not paying a contractor $100 an hour to realize how completely incapable of using a blue chalk line my builders were.

Also on the plus side, if I ever figure out a way to make it work, I’m gonna be so darn proud of myself.

And of course, if it doesn’t, there will be a great wailing and gnashing of teeth in a small town in Texas this weekend. Yea and verily shall there be a disturbance in the force.