So…I almost drank the Apple Koolaid, and bought one of the new top end iMacs…with the Radeon 4850. But lo, I was saved from going to the smug side. (Or in Apple Terminology: iSmug.)

I called the apple store that is “local” for a given value of local, and asked if they had it in stock. The girl said yes. I even made her verify that it was in stock, because it’s a special order system. She put me on hold, then came back and said “yes”. So I drove an hour and a half in rush hour traffic to get to the store, had to park almost a half a mile away…in random rain sprinkles….had to go into one of the malls (NorthPark) populated by the plastic people that make me twitchy, finally got to the store, and they said “Oh, yeah…that’s a special order…you’ll have to order that from apple.com.” Then the little tween trendoid with more hair gel than sense suggested that perhaps I hadn’t talked to anyone at the store, because “nobody *here* could make that mistake”, implying ergo, that *I* was the one who made the mistake.

WTF?! Oh lord, was I pissed. Too pissed to deal rationally with anyone in Hipster Station. Genius bar my happy ass. So…I drove home…in rush hour traffic, and the rain, and with school zones every 30 damn yards…which made me even more cranky. And I called the store, and worked my way up the management chain to a “regional director”.

Who offered the following solution: They would order the 4850 card, take apart one of the macs in stock, put it in, and give me a 10% discount…but it would take 2 weeks, and my computer would show as refurbished, and therefor not eligible for warranty. I said “So…do you see how that’s not really a solution?” She said that she’d be happy to give me a discount on one of the older iMacs and I said “Again…not really a solution, is it?” I felt like I was in the Dead Parrot sketch.

So, for making me drive 3 hours in the rain, in rush hour, on a Friday, in Dallas, to go to the Hipster Station in the heart of Trophy Wife Central for no reason, Apple is now on The List. Oh yes. That List. Nobody wants on The List. Mind you, they’re not as high on The List as Dell…but they are on The List none the less.

Yea and verily have they made me a cranky Deva.

There’s been a lot of buzz about in the industry about Argania Spinosa Kernel Extract and Cecropia Obtusa Bark Extract. Argania is derived from the kernel of the fruit of the Argan tree, Argania spinosa, and native to southern Morocco. It tightens skin immediately and obviously. Cecropia has been shown in studies to reduce cellulite and tighten skin.

The supplies of these materials are limited, as they come from protected species, and all harvesting must be done sustainably and under strict control. The ingredients I’m using in the formula test come from Laboratoires Serobiologiques, via Cognis

I decided to make a mango eye butter.

Ingredients Phase One – %

Water – qs

Lecithin (emulsifier) – 1.5

Ingredients Phase Two

Mango butter – 5

Shea butter – 4

Hemp oil – 4

Palm oil – .5  (1/2)

Ingredients Phase Three

50% blend of water and Argania Spinosa Kernel Extract – 5

Cecropia Obtusa Bark Extract – 3

Procedure:

1. Disperse Lecithin into the water at 50°C with stirring. Mix homogenously.
2. Melt P2 to liquidity. Add into phase I while mixing until a uniform emulsion is formed.
3. Continue mixing until temp drops below 30°C.
4. Add phase III while stirring when temperature drop below 30°C.

The blend turned out nice and fluffy. It holds air well, keeping it from feeling as dense as butters tend to feel. Melts almostly instantly at skin temp, becoming an easy to apply oil/serum. The botanicals blend well, adding a slight coffee tint, and almost imperceptible aroma. I took some of the batch, added it back to the mixer and incorporated a small amount of lavender and ylang ylang essential oils, which rendered the aroma of the active botanicals invisible.

So, the botanicals work in formulations like I would expect something with their density and weight to behave. Now, only time will tell if they work as advertised. I’ll keep you posted.

Also, as you get braver with your recipes, and you realize what a huge difference raw materials makes in your final product, you may decide to go with organic materials, or fair trade or sustainable growth materials.

The oils that go in your soap are the most important ingredient as far as lather, skin conditioning, and quality go. Your oils make up more than 90% of your recipe, so sourcing oils is a really important part of growing your product line. I get asked by a lot of people where I get the organic materials I use for my products.

I’ve used a ton of vendors, and I still source locally when I’m buying small amounts of oils, or doing custom batches, but looking back over purchase orders in the last 5 years, I tend to source all of my organic and fair trade oils from Columbus Foods, via their Soaper’s Choice division.

Mike Lawson is the contact for soapmakers, and he’s probably forgotten more about oils than I’ll ever remember. He’s helped me refine recipes, as well as suggesting potential products. Also, he’s a sweetie.

A few tips if buying from Columbus:

• You can fit six 1-gallon jugs in one shipping box. To save on shipping, try to buy gallons in multiples of six.
• I avoid buying things like palm kernel flakes in the summer. The flakes will melt and you’ll have a big ol block o’ palm kernel. Palm kernel is difficult at best, and a 50 pound block of it is the stuff of messy nightmares.
• Avoid buying butters in the summer for the same reason. (Keeping in mind that my summers are based on living in the center of the sun where it’s regularly triple digits. Your mileage may vary.)
• If you’re buying considerably more oil than you expect to use right away, be sure to invest in some Vitamin E oil at the same time. Adding E will significantly improve your storage time, assuming the oils are kept cool and dry.
• Remember that each gallon of oil weighs between 7 and 10 pounds, depending on the density of the oil. Shipping rates have gone through the roof with the rise is gas prices, and you’ll be shipping things that are freight-weight. Columbus doesn’t have a big shipping markup, but heavy stuff isn’t cheap to ship.

So there you have it; a fantastic resource for high quality, reasonably priced oils. Nothing stands between you and your plans for global soapy domination.

Disclaimer: I have not been compensated in any way for this review, nor do I have a vested interest in Columbus Foods.